Long Absence

I realize that it’s been over a year now since I made my last post on here.  I’m hoping to change that and keep this updated regularly.  I’m wanting to spend less time posting on Facebook and more time posting here.  (We’ll see how long that lasts!)

I had my plastic surgery over a year ago now, and it wasn’t a bad recovery, but sort of slow to just get to feeling 100%.  I never did get my energy back to where it was.  I think it was just that the surgery made me lose my momentum, and I never got it back.

Last year I DID make the commitment to do at least 1 race a month.  I ended up meeting that goal, but the in between times – I didn’t do much extra.  Tommie wasn’t into riding bikes last year and we just weren’t that “into” much of anything.  Then when this winter hit……let’s just say the winter depression is hitting me hard this year.  I’m having a hard time working up any desire to do ANYTHING.

It’s been like a vicious cycle with me.  I’ve gained weight and when I look at myself I get so mad at myself, and tell myself I need to get my control back, but then what do I do?  I stress eat.  (It’s a fat girl thing)

There is a 2nd surgery I need to have, but I refuse to let myself get it until I lose my weight again.  In the meantime – I’ll just feel awkward and mad at myself, and hopefully get back on the right track!

One step I have made in the right direction is that I found a gym to join.  Tommie and I joined the gym at North Kansas City Hospital.  I’ve been needing to get back to strength training.  I can do cardio without a gym, but I needed the gym for the toning and muscle strength.  I think I’m going to hire a personal trainer at least for one 6 session set.  Just to get myself on a routine that I can maintain on my own.  I feel like I have no idea what I’m doing when I’m in there.  Tommie has been strictly been doing cardio, but I’m wanting to do more than that.  So I’ve put in a request for a trainer to get in touch with me to set that up.  With the depression – I’m having to MAKE myself go.  I don’t feel like going.  It’s a good thing that I have Tommie, who pushes us to go at the moment.

Well – This was just a post to try to get me back on track to posting again.  I’ll make more posts at a later time.  For now I’m going to go read my book some.

Thanks for stopping by.


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